Resolutions I Can Actually Keep

Normally I don’t believe in making resolutions. Mostly because I never stick to them. But this year I’ve decided to make the kind that I can actually keep. Here goes….

1. I resolve not to compare NaijaWife to Voltron anymore…I’ll just find some other cartoon character for comparison.

NaijaWife says she'll slice me like Voltron if I don't stop calling her that...
NaijaWife says she’ll slice me like Voltron if I don’t stop calling her that…

2. I promise not to eat NaijaWife’s Jacob’s Crackers any more….but her Rich Tea is still fair game.

How can I control myself when she keeps putting biscuits in the tin?

3. I resolve to make an effort to do more fixing around the house. I don’t resolve to actually be good at it though.

I resolve to stop thinking she looks like this when she wears a shower cap

4. I resolve to always believe my wife is the sexiest woman in the world….no matter how many hair nets she wears or how many chicken bones she decimates in my presence.

5. I resolve to never be this man. Ever.

6. I resolve to never make my wife kneel in public….but in private, anything goes.

7. I resolve to find new ways to avoid NaijaWife saying “If you like.”

8. I resolve not to give my wife any reasons to bear a grudge against me…this probably means I will have to stop doing anything and everything that I normally do. Such as breathing….but that should be easy enough.

Have you seen this movie? Naijawife stars in it
Grudges will turn you into this

9. I resolve to never give NaijaWife any fears that we will go broke, or have to resort to stealing food in sandwich bags…and to finally give her that budget for Brazilian weaves.

You want a budget for Brazilian weaves? Hahahah! Good one!

10. I resolve to continue doing the homework we receive from our counseling.  That shouldn’t be too hard as I plan to just copy the answers in her book.

11.  I resolve to continue to make her the One. Over and over again.

12.  I resolve to continue to respect her as my partner and life companion. I’m not interested in finding another one.

13.  I resolve to stop sneaking into her bathroom behind her back.  I also resolve to use the toilet less. Which means I will have to eat less…which pushes me closer to the six pack I’ve always wanted…so this is a win-win situation.

14.  I resolve to use lotion. This will be hard for me, but she’s threatened to destroy my ipad mini if I don’t.

This will not be me in 2014
This will not be me in 2014

15.  Unlike most people, I resolve to read fewer books in 2014. They’re just bad for my health.

16. I resolve not to flip out the next time she asks me “What are you doing?”…I will simply respond with “I dunno. What are YOU doing?” (She really hates it when I do that.)

17. I resolve not to deliberately antagonize my wife.  No matter how much fun it is. .

18.  I resolve to try (emphasis on TRY) not to ignore her when I’m watching television. She shouldn’t have to fall ill before I pay attention to her.

19.  I resolve to communicate better with my wife, no matter how jammed I am at work.

Can't be too jammed for the wife in 2014
Can’t be too jammed for the wife in 2014

20.  I resolve to write her more letters. She really likes them for some reason.

21.  I resolve not to poke fun at her misadventures. There’s always a lesson to be learned from the Close Encounters of the NaijaWife kind.

22.  I resolve to buy her better gifts. But as one last hurrah, I wrapped her 2013 gift in newspaper. Just for old time’s sake.

23. I resolve to always be grateful to our readers.

My wife and I are very grateful
My wife and I are very grateful

 Happy New Year Everyone!





28 responses to “Resolutions I Can Actually Keep”

  1. highlandblue Avatar

    Lemme go and read

    1. imperfectlyperfect92 Avatar

      Happy New year Nh and Nw! And you still wrapped last year’s gift with newspaper?? Kai!

  2. stupendousgrace Avatar

    Lovely! i love all the snippets from 2013 posts, was a worthy trip down memory lane. Happy New Year. Love you guys!

  3. browneyedgirl Avatar

    Brazilian weave? For some reason I’d always thought of Naija wife as a strong black nappy-headed chick who’d fight for the freedom to wear her own hair however she wants. Try as I might, my mental image of her does not reconcile with a Brazilian weave wearing kind of chick. I hope one day you guys will finally come out and reveal yourselves . Anyhow, a very happy new year to you both, full of new discoveries, peace and togetherness.

    1. NaijaHusband Avatar

      On my wife’s behalf, I’ll clarify. The short answer is: She wants the budget…not the weave itself! 😉
      Also, please don’t let her catch you using the term “nappy headed”! ( I learnt that lesson the hard way…maybe I’ll do a post on it)

      1. toyin Avatar

        One more clue! Naijawife is a natural hair chick! *Sherlock Holmes moves*!

  4. kophojomo Avatar

    Yay! Glad to be here in the new year!

  5. Gnews Avatar

    Awwwww I love naija wife nd naija husband. Your articles re rili rili nice nd very real. Happy new year 2 yu too nd thank yu soo much 4 yur posts dey make me happy

  6. Arikelomo Avatar

    Looool. This was a fun and inspiring piece to read as usual. I was hoping the list got to number 100 tho :(! Anyhoo, I wish you both a year full of more marital bliss.

  7. enajyte Avatar

    Lol @ peeps who’ll have to follow all the links to make sense of this post.

    Happy New Year guys. I appreciate you even more this year.

  8. Dayo Avatar

    Very funny,absolutely hilarious.God bless ur marriage

  9. jinkelele Avatar

    Happy new year to you tooo

    Though your antagonising her makes for good blog posts lol

    so easy on that resolution

  10. aderonke Avatar

    Awwwww this is hilarious, as usual. Happy new year to the amazing couple too

  11. LadyK Avatar

    Heehee….correct resolutions!!! On to a better and more wonder 2014

  12. LadyK Avatar

    wonder filled*

    1. Kilson Avatar

      Pretty interesting resolutions!… Well I resolve to comment here often. You guys are role models! Keep up on the humour too. Special shout out to Naijawife.

  13. worshipandswag Avatar

    Naija Husband, I find it funny that your “resolve” is always followed by “try.” We are here to keep you accountable on behalf of Naija Wife. Don’t get too comfortable! 🙂

  14. 1 + The One Avatar

    Awww! Lovely post to start off the year!! Happy New Year!! We say AMEN to the resolutions :-)… Please keep us updated on progress lol

  15. Cannime Avatar

    Happy new year NH and NW! May this be a blessings filled year. I love the new year resolutions NH I would like to know how NW feels about them.. Esp her rich tea.. lol lolly

  16. Anosi Avatar

    I am feeling like an exclusive member of the Naijahusband blog when I see all these links and references and I remember their content. Happy New year to you both.

  17. Tomi Avatar

    lmaoooo NH!!! The first time i discovered your blog i stayed up for about 2 hours and read EVERY post! I was rolling laughing at this one because I know ALL the stories lmaooo happy new year to both of you!!! and yes we are going to keep you accountable on behalf of NW. 🙂 🙂

  18. JenniferA Avatar

    We should make all our husbands use “more” lotion though. That’s a good one. lol.

  19. abitobiabi Avatar

    happy new year to both of you

  20. livelytwist Avatar

    Happy New Year Naija husband & wife… should be an interesting one 🙂

  21. bimbyz Avatar

    This got me teary-eyed. Not read your posts in 6 months, i’ve been so busy. I admire and love you both is all i can say.

    1. bola Avatar

      skull display picture?? really???? -___________-

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